Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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