I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
