I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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