we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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