why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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