I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
