well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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