We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I intend to get homeless drunk
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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