YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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