did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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