you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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