just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
