Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
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