is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
