no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
