Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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