I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
