I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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