but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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