I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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