Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize