is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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