Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
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