I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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