508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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