I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
