Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
