idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
