Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
