Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
