She said her name was "party"
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
