How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
