Christians are straight up FREAKS
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
