end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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