i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize