hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
