Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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