We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
