So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Someone shit on the floor
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
