woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
