Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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