I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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