dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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