Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
