he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
