So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
