its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
