i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Randomize
