we're blogging at a bar
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
