When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
